Thursday, March 29, 2007

NFL Live 3.29.07

For your comedic pleasure, the top 2 QBs in this draft will be broken down by the NFL analyst dream team of Floyd Reese, Sean Salisbury, and...Donovan McNabb? Well, it can't be that much worse than the standard of QB evaluation already set by that program right?

Let's start with JaMarcus Russell's footwork!

McNabb: "A lot of times he tries to overpower throws"

Yeah, Russell has a lot of issues. Lucky for him, he just bleeds upside.

Floyd Reese: "He's as sound as you'll see...His footwork isn't the same twice... He wasn't coached properly because he can 'run fast'"

I know its tough to talk coherently on TV, but lets' break this down.

"He's as sound as you'll see..."

This is clearly the worst thing that has ever been said about DMac on an ESPN program. Dude makes honest analysis, and that big white boy Floyd Reese just spits in his face.

"His footwork isn't the same twice..."

Okay, but if he's 'as sound as you'll see'-

"He wasn't coached properly because he can 'run fast'"

-then...what?! He's as sound as any player, but he hasn't yet mastered the QB dropback at age 21? Obviously this is because the QB coaching at LSU isn't even high school caliber! I mean, why would you teach a guy how to pass properly when he can run?

For the record, Jamarcus Russell ran in the 4.8 range at his pro day. One of the players who ran faster at his pro day was Central Michigan's Joe Staley, AN OFFENSIVE TACKLE. Look, I know Floyd Reese selected Vince Young, but just because you watched game film on Vince Young, who is fast, does not make ALL black QBs fast. That's like saying all white QBs are smart. It's nothing more than a stereotype.

JaMarcus Russell can't run. Donovan, take Mr. Reese to school.

"He's not following through...Here he throws into coverage"

Thank you.

Sean Salisbury realizes he's losing air time: "Doesn't look like he ever gets his hips open"

Thank you, Sean.

The guys now move on to breaking down Brady Quinn's mechanics

Salisbury: "His mechanics break down in the 2 minute drill"

Well, I'd say that would definately hurt his ability to help his team win.

"and that makes him better"

Sometimes I think Salisbury just opens his mouth to hear himself talk.

Reese: "These men are young, there are questions about maturity, JaMarcus Russell must understand the league, we must see Quinn's intangibles"

Uh, I don't know if anyone is questioning either guys' maturity. What the hell does "understand the league" mean? I don't think you can see any more of Brady Quinn's intangibles until the season starts. At that point, he will demonstrate his toughness and grittyness as he rides the bench in anticipation of a day when he can play.

Tell us gentlemen how being drafted Oakland will suck all the upside out of JaMarcus Russell's bloodstream until he runs completely dry:

McNabb: "It all starts up front. Russell has big upside, arm strength doesn't win ballgames"

Upside reference notwithstanding, I'm starting to like Donovan McNabb as an analyst. He seems to understand what matters when it comes to grading QB play. There's something in the water in Philly that turns fans in to rabid animals, and Quarterbacks into respectable analysts.

Just for kicks, here's Linda Cohn after Donovan McNabb states that the Eagles' biggest rival is the Dallas Cowboys:

"And we all know who is on THAT team"

McNabb: "Yes, Tony Romo"

And Cohn finishes: "Well, you got the 'T' initial right"

There you have it. Linda Cohn confirms what we already knew about the ESPN mentality. Nothing in Dallas matters anymore except when that asshole receiver is taking his next crap.

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